He was making calls that normally they let slide or only call when the infraction is really obvious. Most of us parents on the sidelines have never played before so we're still learning about things like off-sides and indirect kicks. So at half time my son's soccer game the referee did something really surprising... he came over to the sideline and asked us how we thought the game was going and if we had any questions about what he had called on the field. Silence.... But he did not leave it there, he reviewed three calls that he made that may have been controversial or misunderstood and described them to us. He explained that "The goalie can step over the line of the goalie box and kick the ball if it is released behind the line" - in our case he did not release it soon enough and the penalty was called against us. After two more scenarios he asked if we had any other questions and when no one did, he thanked us for coming to the game. This all took about two minutes of his time, but made a big impression on all of us.
In this two minutes, he established his expertise in a way that was helpful, non-threatening, and positive and he gave us the gift of new knowledge and understanding. In doing this he had to step over a line himself. He did not follow normal protocol and go get a drink and talk with the line judges for the short half time. He took a risk and made a positive impact. We left this brief interaction feeling better about him, the league, referees in general, and ourselves.
I think this is something we can benefit from as project managers too. We can be on both sides of this dialogue as well (that may be considered off-sides in soccer - I really don't get that call yet!) . We can receive new knowledge by being interested and 'coachable' with our project teams and share our passion and expertise in project management or any subject as a way of building a high-functioning supportive team. All we need to do is care enough to share two minutes of time receiving a gift of knowledge from an expert with passion and pass it on. I hope you do!
Do great things -- (with goals!)
Ed Sullivan, PMP
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Still teaching at 99
No, this is not about some amazing near-centenarian who is still in the workforce slogging it out with the rest of us! It does involve a woman I met a few weeks ago who recently turned 99 and is still teaching valuable lessons to everyone she meets. She teaches by example. Not everyone understands or appreciates the lessons as they receive them and I found myself recognizing my learnings only after some reflection.
So what were the lessons?
I'll just start today with the first - "think positive"
Margaret is her name, she was born in 1912 and lived through the depression and has always been a positive person with a can-do approach to life. When she was in her mid-nineties, she had a fall and injured her head leading to the need for brain surgery. Post operation, she worked to regain her independence and eventually she moved back into her home where she had lived independently for nearly 40 years. Unfortunatly this was short-lived as her memory was challenged either by the injury or in combination with some form of dementia and memory loss. She eventually moved to a nursing home and has been there about two years now - which brings us to my visit a few weeks ago...
She was tired and did not recognize her son who was trying to introduce me. She did not know that her mother or siblings have all passed or where exactly she was. She does not understand much about her surroundings, her past, or her current life. She could recall the name of one of her sisters and that for siblings "there were a bunch of us". I imagine this type of environment with limited connections to past or present could be very frightening, cold and negative.
Despite this, during our conversations she regularly inserted comments of positivity. When walking slowly to a chair she said "we'll get there", when talking about birthday cake she said "that will be nice" , when talking about something difficult she said "we'll get through it" on the subject of work she said, "well we've all got to work hard at it". When asked how old she felt, she said "I don't know, maybe 29?"
With so much of her memory and history erased, positve responses and affirmations like these still came easily to the surface! My belief is that these must be so core, so foundational and automatic in her being that she still has them with her. She has used them (and still does) to motivate and provide strength for herself and others through the difficult times in life.
Lesson learned!
Do Positively Great Things!
Ed Sullivan, PMP
So what were the lessons?
- think positive
- say nice things
- smile a lot
- touch is important
I'll just start today with the first - "think positive"
Margaret is her name, she was born in 1912 and lived through the depression and has always been a positive person with a can-do approach to life. When she was in her mid-nineties, she had a fall and injured her head leading to the need for brain surgery. Post operation, she worked to regain her independence and eventually she moved back into her home where she had lived independently for nearly 40 years. Unfortunatly this was short-lived as her memory was challenged either by the injury or in combination with some form of dementia and memory loss. She eventually moved to a nursing home and has been there about two years now - which brings us to my visit a few weeks ago...
She was tired and did not recognize her son who was trying to introduce me. She did not know that her mother or siblings have all passed or where exactly she was. She does not understand much about her surroundings, her past, or her current life. She could recall the name of one of her sisters and that for siblings "there were a bunch of us". I imagine this type of environment with limited connections to past or present could be very frightening, cold and negative.
Despite this, during our conversations she regularly inserted comments of positivity. When walking slowly to a chair she said "we'll get there", when talking about birthday cake she said "that will be nice" , when talking about something difficult she said "we'll get through it" on the subject of work she said, "well we've all got to work hard at it". When asked how old she felt, she said "I don't know, maybe 29?"
With so much of her memory and history erased, positve responses and affirmations like these still came easily to the surface! My belief is that these must be so core, so foundational and automatic in her being that she still has them with her. She has used them (and still does) to motivate and provide strength for herself and others through the difficult times in life.
Lesson learned!
Do Positively Great Things!
Ed Sullivan, PMP
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